
The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can.
Howard Shore’s Bag End
I know it’s been awhile since I posted what’s happening with me. I’ve hit one of those depressed places, where I can’t do much beyond getting out of bed in the morning. Another cycle has come and gone, and now I’m probably not going to be able to see the RE until sometime in May because the other months will be a ‘right’ month, and the one ‘left’ month we have, we’ll be travelling out of the country to see my husbands family. My sister-in-law is having a baby. While I’m thrilled and excited, there’s a part of me that aches. I know anyone who’s gone through this understands.
Someone I met who was going through the same thing as me has just gotten pregnant. I’m thrilled for her and again, still aching for the same for myself. I’ll be 39 this June and can’t help but give in to the wonder of whether or not I will ever have that chance.
Staying positive is difficult most days, when not impossible.
I know that ache, I know that place where it is difficult to function normally and it drags you down. It’s tough seeing it happen for others while we stand by and wonder if it will ever happen for us too.